Webcomics Beacon: Dogs Don't Know It's Not Beacon (4 of 4)

As I stated yesterday, Circle Jerks in webcomics lead to artistic stagnation and undue popularity. It doesn't take a lot of talent to provide meaningful criticism, but webtoonists are often blind to their own faults. This excuse does not work when the creators regularly work with other terrible webtoonists to provide criticism to OTHER terrible webtoonists. Like the crossover I discussed yesterday, running a podcast is another great way for atrocious webcomics to Circle Jerk. The Webcomics Beacon is run by some of the most terrible webcartoonists I've covered with this blog. In fact, I told you those stories so I could tell you this one.

First and foremost, this podcast is way too long. Each episode is over an hour long, and if you're talking about webcomics for more than an hour, the evidence indicates that you just like hearing your own voice. I do like that these amateurs don't talk about one webcomic for the whole hour, but rather a certain trend or meme among comics, but the topics are still too broad and general. The hosts also have a tendency to go off-topic often, which contributes to the excessive dragging-onnery of this podcast. Additionally there is a lot of dead air and simultaneous talking, all of which could be remedied with a structured program and pre-planning. Having a set rotation for asking and answering questions would definitely cut down on the confusion, and figuring out what the best questions are and focusing on those would probably cut the runtime down to a reasonable half-hour.

The bigger problem is that the hosts may or may not be giving good criticism, but the comics made by the hosts undercut that criticism by being so terrible. The idea is, "If they can't use their advice to improve themselves, why should anyone else do so?" Of course, I completely agree with this argument. A better use for a group such as this would be to turn their critical eyes inwards, and utilize each other to improve themselves. Of course, since the entire point is to increase readership for everyone involved, the hosts are not going to turn too critical an eye (least of all towards their guests) resulting in a shallow and unchallenging show. The only criticism being offered is towards those who aren't on the show, giving off the impression that the Webcomics Beacon is used to signify an impending circle jerk.

The actual website is also a mess, and has so many circle jerking links that it overloads the reader with too much irrelevant information. There's an entire section devoted to Webcomic Milestones which just tells the reader which webcomics have completed an arbitrary number of pages or existed for an arbitrary number of years, with no discretion based on quality, consistency or continuity. Another section lists every single site mentioned in the week's show, no matter how passing the reference. While nice for those who find themselves asking "what are they talking about?", reducing the size of the section to only those sites talked about in depth would keep it from being overwhelming.

It is human nature to want to promote your creations, and the Internet is an easy way to do so. However the act of self-promotion often leads to introspection and growth after being rejected. When artists take the easy way out by promoting themselves through others and cutting quick deals often end up being screwed over by a bad deal. Some might get lucky, sure, but the best works are going to come from those who aren't relying on finding a great bargain, but instead put the effort into themselves and their own works. Creating new assets to bargain with, such as a podcast, are only indicative of desperation, and it almost becomes a spectacle to watch and see just when someone gets burned. While those who wish to build themselves up through their own merits should stay away, the Webcomics Beacon signals to all those who wish to dash themselves upon the jagged rocks. Read more→

PSI: The Pressure to Make a Good Comic is Often Overwhelming (3 of 4)

The Circle Jerk is a useful tool for aspiring webcomic creators to generate public awareness of their creation. By doing crossovers with other unknown comics, one can triple his readership (from 3 to 9). While decent webtoonists often have to carve their readership on the merits of their own skills and word-of-mouth advertising, these less-than-talented people can swap fanbases with others simply by trading cameo appearances. This is because fans of terrible webcomics have no taste, and as such, will be willing to jump onto many other terrible webcomics just for the sake of having something to read. After I dipped my hand into the vat of volatile chemicals labelled "A Pessimistic Sense of Inadequacy" (more commonly known as PSI) I was immediately overwhelmed with Circle Jerkiness, as well as other terrible offenses added for color and odor.

PSI is the tale of Gordon Freeman's retarded half-brother Fes and a giant anthropomorphic rat Ernst (also known as a 'furry'). Together, these two travel with some girl with no fashion sense and whose only ambition in life is to become a furry. If you're not aware, Furries are people who like to think they are humanoid animals, and are often sexually aroused by a dog walking on its hind legs. They are often the targets of ridicule and harassment, and liken themselves to racial or religious minorities, but in actuality are closer to the rednecks from that trailer park on the other side of town, except they don't run meth labs.

For the past 11,000 months or so, PSI has been engaged in a gigantic circle jerk with other terrible webcomics. Extending for 100+ pages, with only a few non-crossover pages in between, PSI has been building itself up through others. Known only as the "Crossover Wars" (and actually the project of another terrible webcomic entirely), a Circle Jerk of massive proportions engulfed all of the untalented webtoonists around and made a mess of everyone and everything. Ultimately, this was admitted to be irrelevant to the PSI plotline and clearly nothing more than a ploy to increase readership. The problem with convoluted and extended crossover appearances is that it seriously muddles the storyline. People often lose interest in the original plot, and potential new readers feel overwhelmed that they have to read the archives of not only one, but several comics just to understand what is going on, and will usually decided to get their kicks elsewhere.

Another travesty is the insistence of the author to use bizarre and confusing onomatopaeia. While it doesn't do the same thing as almost every other terrible use of onomatopaiea and simply use a verb like 'flip' or 'jump' or 'toss' to indicate a sound, the usage of undeterminable sounds such as 'fwash' or 'z-zoft' or 'strrrrrrrrrrack' will alienate the reader who is unsure how these unusual sounds are supposed to sound, and strike me as an attempt to be a unique snowflake by using sounds which no one else has used. The end result, however, is a fair amount of noodle-scratching by readers and great targets for ridicule. The art is also terrible but I'm getting tired of mentioning it in every post I make so I'm gonna let it slide this time.

Many people often confuse 'readership' for 'quality,' thinking that the more readers a comic has, the better it is. There are, of course, many counter-examples to this statement. Simply whoring your characters out for readers is a terrible idea, since most of the fans generated by this act are going to fall under the "retarded, delusional and way too emotionally invested in this terrible webcomic" category. These types of fans are festering tumors on the body of webcomics, creating a sense of legitimacy for that mutation of a third arm or ninth finger that we see so often. Crossovers lead to massive growth in these tumors which result in blockage of both personal growth and fresh readership. Perhaps by removing the crossovers and those that utilize them, such as PSI, we can help alleviate some of the pressure. Read more→